Why Do Single People Give Best Relationship Advice? // Zakaj dajejo samski ljudje najboljše nasvete (o odnosih)?

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Yup. I’m the one. The friend that is always single but gives great relationship advice.
Why is that? How come I give best advice on a topic I, by logic, shouldn’t be an expert in?

We teach best what we most need to learn.”

This sentence right here. This is the truth. I’m actually really good at reading people and their situations, but how come I’m blind as a bat when it comes to relationships in my life?
The answer is quite simple actually; when you’re in love, have a crush, the part of your brain that is in charge of good decision making, shuts down. This is why we become fearless when we’re in love – not because we’re actually brave, but because our brain doesn’t recognize the stupidity of what we’re about to do. You’re also flooded by different hormones causing you to feel the same ‘happiness’ you feel when you take drugs – basically love makes you an addict. This is why we feel like we’re addicted to a person sometimes – because we actually are.
Basically – heart is stupid and it makes your brain stupid, as well. You are incapable of looking at your situation objectively, so you ask someone who can – which can be a person in a relationship, or better yet – a single person whose head isn’t messed up by them hormones. If you’re truly looking for an objective answer, you should always ask a single person.

But if we’re really good at giving advice and seeing things as they are – can we do something to see our things clearer, less subjective?
I’ve recently tried this method – I copy my situation onto another person and think of what advice I would give them. I’ve noticed that the answer I give myself when I’m just thinking about my situation from my perspective is quite different than the answer I’d give another person if they were in my situation.
I’ve noticed how many of my decisions are based solely on emotions, and how crazy, stupid and illogical they sound when I paste them on another person.
A lot of articles talk about single people as if we were another race – they say we give best relationship advice because we have higher standards, boundaries, we’ve made mistakes, we’ve had heartbreaks…Haven’t we all? I mean, we’ve all been in a relationship at one time, and single the next, it’s not like people who are single the majority of time are somehow smarter when it comes to relationships (obviously), or have higher standards (we don’t), it’s just – when we are single we can be objective because our brain isn’t flooded with love chemicals.

That’s all there is to it. Simple chemistry. So, if you need an advice about your relationship – talk to your single friend.

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